When it comes to first dates – they can be good, bad and downright ugly. And when I say ugly I mean – super messy, why am I here, block his number while still out to dinner with him – ugly. Especially when it comes to meeting total strangers on dating apps. It seems everyone I talk to
My First Date Fails
The I’m-So-Pretty Guy
Hands down the worst first date of my life
The I-Run-From-The-Cops Guy
I somewhat recently went on a date with a guy who claimed a license plate on the front of his car was both unnecessary and an eyesore to his car. Too bad it’s the law in Ontario to have one. When I asked if he’s ever been pulled over by the cops for it he grinned and exclaimed, “nope, because they can’t catch me!”. Turns out he’s run from the cops several times and reassured me it’s alright because they can’t catch up to him. Eye roll central.
The I-Can’t-Get-My-Hair-Wet Guy
While this date wasn’t a total fail – it did have
The I’ve-Cheated-On-Every-Girl-I’ve-Ever-Been-With Guy
Fun fact – the first date I went on after my ex (who cheated on me) was with a guy who shared with me (after a few drinks) he had cheated on every single girl he had dated. When I asked him “WTF dude” he told me it was alright because he was “in therapy for it”. Needless to
The Hasn’t-Washed-His-Hair-In-A-Decade Guy
This dude had what looked like sopping wet hair. I’m talking freshly out of the shower hair. Turns out not only did he not shower that day, he probably hadn’t for like, a decade. Upon further investigation, it was also accompanied by a very distinct and unforgettable odor. First dates + cleanliness = essential.
I won’t repeat what he actually thought was funny – but y’all, it was disgusting. Enough to totally turn me off and fear for my safety. I understand everyone’s humor is different but when the term psyc
*Boundary crossing trigger warning* After a nice dinner, I explained to him I wanted to spend time at his place but didn’t want anything sexual. Minutes after entering his apartment my jeans were grabbed at full force. Luckily I was able to push away and leave. No means no. I’m lucky to have left untouched but I know so many aren’t. A pivotal learning experience for me. He was later blocked/deleted.
The I’m-Not-Over-My-Ex Guy
Unfortunately, this was a standup guy. But when you know the hair color, meal preference and family history of an ex after the first date- they’re clearly not over them. Also, the girl is a hot mess. Next.
Your First Date Fails
The Foot Fetish Dude
My first match off Hinge ever. He was v cute, well dressed, works in finance in Toronto so his pics are like him in suits I’m like damn, then finally after like a month of talking got the courage to meet him and he was normal and smart in person I’m like wow not bad. Then he starts asking me via text what shoe brands I like etc and is persistent, asking what size I am which threw me off so I’m like wait are you into feet or something. Then he’s like
The Married Man
I met up with a guy on Tinder and ended talking for a few hours. We didn’t hit it off so I gave him an awful side hug and the next day I got texts from his wife saying she found my phone number through her phone carrier. She told me a guy from work invited him out for drinks and since we are new to the area she encouraged him to go! It ended up he was married with kids.
The Outback Steakhouse Employee
I was 24. I had to pick him up because
The Sex-On-The-Third-Date Rule Guy
I was 18 and on a first date with a guy I had met at a disco. I wasn’t even really that into him. He was making the moves on me and I wasn’t interested. He then told me his brother told him that a girl is supposed to have sex with you on the third date. Then I said, “then this is our last date” and ended the date right there.
The Drunk Ghost
I met up with a girl at Texas Roadhouse for dinner. I show up and text/call her for 20 minutes and she finally calls back and said she was at the bar. She’s already kinda drunk. We go to the table and she immediately orders shots then leaves to go to the bathroom. 30 minutes go by so I asked the waiter to go in and check on her. It turns out she went to the bar and had been ordering drinks and shots for herself and everyone else at the bar the entire time! At that
The Good Roommate
Asked to pick up a bottle of 7up for his roomie on my way over to pick him up for a 1st date
I’ve been online dating since 2014 or 2015. I’ve been on at least 30 first dates (or as I call them “meet &greets”) with someone I met online. This guy, 6’4 successful and pretty much my type. after we had dinner, a
The Nacho Hog
I went out for Mexican food with a guy on our first date. We were supposed to “share” a nacho plate, he ate all the chips with chicken and cheese on them and left me with naked chips.
The Cheap Catfish
This was like when I was first on tinder. I was talking to this guy. He was so great. Personality wise while texting we really clicked. Anyways so we decide to meet at this cool bar that has bowling and games. I get there. I WAS CATFISHED. he was much heavier than he was in his profile pictures so they must have been old. Ok. Try not to be shallow. We get drinks and because it’s a Saturday the bartender is like you have to pay for drinks as you go, it’s not like a bill at the end. So we order the first round and he looks at me to pay for it!! Um ok. It went downhill from there. He was a bit of a loser. Just in terms of ambition and stuff. We only had the one drink because I was like I’m not paying for the whole evening wtf. Anyways I never spoke to him again after. I was so turned off.
The Sangria Enthusiast
[My date] walked out of the restaurant with the unfinished pitcher of sangria that we didn’t finish.
The Love Struck Poet
I met the most poetic guy, and not the good kind. On the first
The Painfully Shy Introvert
I had a crush on this guy since grade 2. I was so shy I never talked to him. Mutual friends suggested he take me to the junior prom. So that’s how I got my invitation. Prom rolls around and he comes to the door and we say hi. We proceed to take pictures, go to dinner with friends and went to the prom and then went to the beach. Then we drove home. Said goodbye.
The Clingy Drunk
I had been talking to this guy from Tinder. The first red flag I should have noticed was when I was on my way to meet him and he texted, “Guess what I just took a shot
There’s A Reason For The Madness
Unless you’re one of the lucky ones – most women (and men!) will experience a train wreck of a first date. If you find yourself on a bad date (or worse, a string of bad dates) know you’re now alone! What’s even better? Every bad date you experience will make finding the right person even more special. One day you’ll look back on these dates and laugh. Dating Tip: If you’re single and dating – start a dating
Hold Out For The One
No matter how lonely, frustrated, fed up – don’t settle. It may seem like you’ve been single forever – but keep looking. As my brother told me once “never give up”. I’d rather be happily single than locked into an unhappy relationship any day. After