The other day, my girlfriend Nicolle of Topknots And Pearls and I were Facetiming, catching up on life. We have this awesome friendship where although we’ve never actually met in real life, we share this bond of familiarity. We’re more alike than not – both late 20s, entrepreneurs, Christians, brunettes, have an insatiable love for fashion & beauty – and we’re both single. When you’re closely approaching your 30s… the number of single friends tends to dwindle. So, this friendship holds a special place in my heart. We often text each other screenshots of dating ridiculousness, spontaneous trip ideas and sometimes… prayer requests for tender hearts. Dating is all the things: fun, empowering, exhausting, frustrating, thrilling. It’s the ultimate roller coaster. It can also be confusing AF with the rise of social media apps. Where does a girl start? Well, we’re here to walk with you along your singleness and dating experiences. While we’re no relationship experts, we’ve been on a heck of a lot of dates the past few years. We’ve been thrown headfirst into dating in 2019 and let me tell you… it’s not easy! So, we decided to start a dating series… a no BS dating series. We will be sharing everything from fun date ideas to clues to look for a good guy in dating profiles to understanding hookup culture and embarrassing date experiences. It will be raw and unfiltered. Classy but sassy. And most importantly, no BS. Our first topic: “Why Are You Single”. Oh boy, here we go.
So, why are you single? That’s a question I’ve been asked many times over the past little while. I usually get a bewildered look when asked, as if I have three heads.
The short answer? I haven’t found someone I want to be with.
The long answer? You’ll first need a quick history lesson on my dating experiences. Ever since I was 16, I’ve been in a long term, serious relationship. I had 3 back-to-back boyfriends – all of which I loved deeply at the time. The first – my best friend – the one I experienced all my firsts with. After that, I met my second – my first love – the one I felt like I was on cloud 9 with. The third – my wolf in sheep’s clothing – an extremely toxic relationship – the one I lost myself in. For those 10 years, I never got to experience singleness. I never got to know myself without a man. So much of my identity was wrapped up in who I was dating. After my third, I decided it was time to try out the single life, get to know myself a little better and learn to navigate life on my own. So, why am I single? For the first little while, I forced myself to be. I needed to be. Now, after getting to know myself better through the solo life (and lots of therapy!) I am waiting for someone who lines up with my values. Who prioritizes me. Who chooses me everyday. Who gives me butterflies. I just haven’t met him yet (hi, Michael Bumblé!). Am I excited to meet him? Yes. I can’t wait to find my person. But until then, I won’t settle for anything less.
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So now that you know why I’m single, I’m so excited for the weeks to come with this No BS dating series. We’ve got a bunch of ideas in mind, but if you have a topic in particular you’d like us to discuss – you can email me directly at firstname.lastname@example.org. We want this series to be as interactive as possible. We’re here with ya, girlfriend! Until next time, happy no BS dating!